Don’t Judge, Judy!

I have a love/hate relationship with social media. On one hand, I love being able to stay abreast of what’s happening in the lives of the people I care about.

But there is a really dark side to social media: bullying and shaming.

Over the last couple of years, there have been a lot of news stories about the “pandemic puppy” phenomenon. With people spending a lot more time at home, the pandemic was an ideal time to adopt pets. So a lot of people did. Then, as time went on, we started to see stories popping up about folks “getting bored” with having pets, or deciding it wasn’t really for them, and giving them up.

This supposed development has given a lot of people on social media an excuse to do what they love most: act morally superior and express harsh judgment.

It’s all too easy to insist that you would never do such a thing or to demonize people who surrender animals to the shelter under any circumstances. If you’re one of these people who has posted about how shameful it is for people to give up their pets, I’ve got some sobering news for you.

People surrender animals to shelters for a variety of reasons. But being bored with a dog or getting sick of finding black cat hair everywhere are not among the leading causes of people surrendering pets to shelters. Rather, serious problems and circumstantial crises in pet owners’ lives are more likely to drive surrenders than bad character.

An analysis by Best Friends Animal Society found pets are relinquished to shelters for reasons related to the owner’s circumstances (housing/eviction, financial insecurity, etc) at roughly a ratio of 3 to 1 as compared to reasons specific to the animal (behavior/health issues). Unlike what many may believe, the animal’s behavior is not a leading reason for surrender. An ASPCA study found nearly half of surrenders involved family or housing problems.

If you’re one of those harsh critics, you might be thinking at this moment, “Well, I didn’t mean those people.”

Here is the problem with that thought. Those people are the ones receiving the overwhelming message that surrender under any circumstances is still grossly cruel abandonment: It’s careless, heartless, and anyone who gives up a pet is just a bad person. Nuance it however you want, but the overarching judgment is clear: surrendering a pet is always wrong.

Sorry Judy, that’s just not true. There are a lot of cases when surrendering a pet is the best choice for that animal and for the family.

The shame around surrendering pets makes people feel like failures for something that is already extremely traumatic. And here is the problem with piling on to that shame and adding to the stigma with public ridicule: It unintentionally encourages people to abandon pets in unsafe situations, hastily rehome them or remain in dangerous situations just to avoid the attack of judgment on their personal character.

And by the way, all of this shame and guilt that pet owners are feeling is making our jobs harder on the shelter side. People often lie about the reasons they are surrendering a pet to us because they are afraid of the judgment, or leave out important information about the pet’s behavior and health because they are afraid of what it says about their character and ability to care for a pet. This makes it more challenging for us to understand the true picture of that animal in order to find the best placement outcome, leading to a longer length of stay, and unnecessary trauma for the animal.

We are missing an opportunity to talk about better ways to approach animal welfare as a whole.

There are better ways to handle hardship surrenders, too. Here at the Santa Fe Animal Shelter, we offer a broad range of alternatives to admission to help keep pets with their owners—such as helping to cover unusual veterinary expenses, providing pet food and supplies for folks who are experiencing financial hardship, and connecting guardians with other human services organizations to help with housing insecurity.

Here is the bottom line: Posturing on social media is unlikely to have any meaningful impact on people callous enough to treat animals like last season’s shoes. But it could make someone who is struggling with an incredibly difficult choice feel even worse.

Jack Hagerman is CEO of the Santa Fe Animal Shelter and Humane Society.