Being Adam Sandler's buddy must feel a little like winning the lottery. All folks like David Spade, Rob Schneider and Nick Swardson have to do is show up, spout wildly unfunny lines from whatever hastily written script satisfies Sandler's end of his Netflix deal and boom—still famous.
In Sandler's newest foray, The Wrong Missy, we find Spade as Tim, a Portland corporate guy on the receiving end of a horrible date with a free-spirit-type called Missy (Lauren Lapkus). She's weird, y'know? Which is hard for assholes. Months later, though, Tim meets the woman of his dreams with the same name, but a case of mistaken text identity becomes a disastrous corporate retreat when he invites the wrong Missy to Hawaii with him for the most important business something-something of his life.
Spade does what he can (people forget he's not a half bad actor) as Lapkus' "eccentric" Missy gives out psychic readings, hypnotizes bosses and throws herself from a cliff into the sea. The usual cadre of Sandler homies (the aforementioned Schneider and Swardson) pop up to say gross misogynist things or engage in the faint hint of physical comedy. Sadly, though, the bulk of The Wrong Missy feels like the most formulaic extended '90s sitcom episode ever: "But if you're here…and I'm here—who's watching my drunk boss?!"
Even worse, the delightful Sarah Chalke (Scrubs) is trotted out as Tim's ex-wife, given a couple jerk-ish lines and then relegated to the background. We could've lost Swardson in exchange for Chalke's spot-on comic timing and sensibilities easily; her simply farting on a snare drum would've been better. And funnier.
Of course, it's hard to blame Sandler and crew for setting the film in Hawaii. The Sandman's -affinity for the state has been clear since 50 First Dates, and if we had Netflix sending us to pretty places for work, we'd probably feel differently. Still, it plays no real purpose outside of a very weird shark sequence that pretty much seems like it was added to justify the location.
But then, it's not supposed to be good, is it? It just is. The Wrong Missy isn't really supposed to be anything, in fact. As far as mid-quarantine programming goes, it's a wonderful time killer and can boast a few chuckles. And Spade really does try—you can tell. Lapkus, however, is -exhausting. The Vanilla Ice cameo is…wait, who is that for?
+Spade's alright, deal with it
-Swardson, Schneider, Lapkus' forced "weirdness"
The Wrong Missy
Directed by Tyler Spindel
With Spade, Lapkus, Swardson, Chalke and Schneider
Netflix, TV-MA, 90 min.