1. SNOWSTORM CANCELS ARROYO CHAMISO ROAD MEETING FOR SECOND TIME
    A sign that Mother Earth does not favor the proposed crossing?
  2. TAIKA WAITITI BECOMES FIRST INDIGENOUS DIRECTOR TO WIN OSCAR FOR JOJO RABBIT SCREENPLAY; BONG JOON-HO’S PARASITE WINS BIG, TOO
    Oscars are still sooooo white, but it’s nice to have at least a little something we actually give a shit about.
  3. EMINEM’S OSCAR PERFORMANCE OF “LOSE YOURSELF” A REAL HEAD-SCRATCHER
    Em probably would have fit in better at the Please, God, Don’t Forget Me awards.
  4. CANNABIS LEGISLATURE SEEMS TO BE STALLING
    Because who wants jobs and revenue and people out of pain?
  5. PELOSI TEARS UP COPY OF STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS
    But also approves Trump’s military budget, so…
  6. YOUR BROOM ISN’T AFFECTED BY SOME MAGICAL COSMIC GRAVITY WELL
    The real treasure was the floors we swept along the way.
  7. SENATORS BOOT TV JOURNALIST FROM HEARING AND PLAN TO HAVE BUDGET TALKS IN SECRET
    Transparency isn’t just a river in Egypt.