1. CHEVEL SHEPHERD WON THE VOICE AFTER ALL, SANG FOR GRISHAM’S INAUGURATION
    That sure shut us up.
  2. AND THAT CAN ONLY MEAN SUSANA MARTINEZ IS GONE!
    Now who’s SFR supposed to sue?
  3. VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN ACT EXPIRED DURING GOV’T SHUTDOWN
    Proving once and for all that 2018 was really the worst.
  4. OH YEAH, AND THE SHUTDOWN CONTINUES
    Sorry to everyone who planned to spend winter vacation visiting Smithsonians or national parks—and yikes to all the TSA agents who had to work the holidays without pay.
  5. THE SNOW BLEW EVERYONE’S MINDS
    And was super beautiful and romantic right up until we realized we had to get places and do things.
  6. FIREWORKS BLASTED OFF FROM THE LA FONDA HOTEL ROOFTOP FOR NEW YEAR’S EVE
    Pets everywhere remain un-thrilled.
  7. THIS YEAR CAN’T POSSIBLY BE WORSE THAN LAST
    Right? RIGHT?!