1. INTERNATIONAL TRADE COMMISSION DROPS NEWSPRINT TARIFF
    Whew!
  2. ZOZOBRA LINES LOCK OUT HUNDREDS AS OLD MAN GLOOM GOES UP IN FLAMES
    Burn them!
  3. NEW YORKER INVITES, THEN DISINVITES STEVE BANNON TO HEADLINE LITERARY FESTIVAL
    They realized they fucked up when Ace Ventura pulled out of the program.
  4. REPUBLICANS KEEP KAVANAUGH’S PAPERS SECRET
    Maybe they contain Trump’s tax returns.
  5. CYFD SAYS IT DIDN’T MISS ANYTHING IN CASE OF SEXUALLY ABUSIVE FOSTER FATHER
    You missed something again.
  6. CITY COUNCIL MEETING GOES UNTIL ALMOST 3AM
    Because tired government is good government.
  7. ENTRADA SHIFTS PAGEANT
    It’s now a footrace between Alan Webber, Archbishop Wester and Regis Pecos.