RIP Halloween

L’Fork has many a friend who has many a kid and, in turn, many a sad story of late about how sitting down the wee ones to be like, “Strangers won’t be hurling candy at you this year because of the virus, kiddo.” So then we were all, “So what’re you gonna do?” Below you’ll find tips from real-life parents we know about how to get through Halloween without ruining your own kids' lives:

“We’re going to do a scavenger hunt in the house and yard,” says one set of parents we know. Apparently they’ll be breaking this up into different types of candy. As in, Jolly Ranchers and Life Savers go in one quadrant, choco stuff in another and so on.

“We’re planning a movie marathon and as of October 1, we’ve been talking to the kids about what they’d like to see,” say another set. Candy will appear, no question, but we like how they’re working with the kids to select films. We think it’ll be fun and that when they narrow down on the movies it’ll feel good knowing they did it as a family.

“In our little tract housing community, people are pretty close—both distance wise and socially—so some of the other folks are organizing a parade. We’ll decorate our cars and toss candy to kids who live along the route,” says one mom we know. This one gets everybody involved, which might be like a nightmare for some people, but the kids get outside and when candy for sure comes from people you know, you can be sure it won’t have drugs in it (which we still say isn’t a thing because who wants to just give their drugs away, especially to kids who wouldn’t appreciate them?)

“I’ve been thinking about doing some kind of Instagram hashtag-based costume contest for my kid and their friends. It’ll take some coordinating so all the parents have similar kinds of candy to hand out as prizes, but sending a few emails seems better than being out in public right now,” says a dad we know. If you knew him, you’d be surprised he’s spearheading the effort. He also said that he gets the urge to just toss candy at a kid, but the activity part is just as important so the kiddos can build memories and the parents can, too.

“My daughter Googled all these creepy recipes, like that meatloaf foot we saw in The Fork awhile back, and some other fun things, and the whole week of Halloween we’re going to create some of these things...like, witches cauldron drinks or something, I’m not sure yet, but we’re making a week of it,” says a cool mom we know. For her, Halloween is still enjoyable for parents, and she says she’s excited her daughter is old enough to start watching some of the good horror movies this year.

“Do you remember Creepy Crawlers?” a friend asked. Yes, we do remember Creep Crawlers—the little toy gummi-making machine you can use to make creepy bug gummis. Well, this bud still has his Creepy Crawler machine from when he was a kid, so he’s gonna make some with his kid. Additionally, he says, he found this blog with ideas for making candy at home. “It’s good because it’s a project, and if I’m keeping my son busy, he won’t realize he’s missing out on things.” Also, since we love you, we went and found you a Creepy Crawler kit you can order immediately.

Any other parents out there with cool ideas? Halloween cakes or something? Hit us up and we’ll share any good ones we get with the class. Oh, and the togethernm.org website has ideas for, like, every single day of the month and doing Halloween.

Watch the whole thing because the jingle has a real Devo flavor to it.

Also

-We only vaguely count it as food because of the popcorn and hotdogs and stuff, but did you hear Regal Cinemas is closing down all its US theaters? We’re bummed for people losing their jobs, but let’s also face it—they were uncomfortable theaters with jacked-up prices, and for people who live in Santa Fe (where there’s a Violet Crown), not the best option. Anyway, we’re putting this in the local section because Santa Fe once had a Regal, but not anymore.

-If you’re growing your own garden, which seems more likely than ever with the whole virus thing, remember that there’s a lot of prep work you must do to get your garden ready for winter. Here’s a handy guide. Also, if you’re looking for like-minded gardening people, don’t forget the Santa Fe Extension Master Gardeners.

-A rather interesting email came our way from the folks at Santa Fe Spirits (they’ve won awards, y’all!) who point out how hundreds of distilleries across the country started making hand sanitizer to stay afloat during the pandemic, but now that the big companies like Purell (bunch of jerks) have caught up to demand, many small shops who were just barely getting by are in danger. Seems that the end of the year might also herald a 400% increase in distilleries' excise tax unless Congress passes the Craft Modernization and Tax Reform Act. You can read more about that act here, and you can remember all those times you liked drinking spirits and call your congressperson.

More Tidbits

-Seems some jabroni in NYC thinks he’s fit to bring green chile to the Big Apple. It is to laugh. And while we wish our transplant buds in the city that never sleeps well, we’ve been to many a New Mexican food joint outside the state that acts weird when we want our food served smothered the heck up. Anyway, Ursula is set to open in Crown Heights, and while its chef/founder Eric See reportedly grew up here, we’ll just have to wait and see what’s what. Also, why are New Mexicans so territorial about chile? Like, we’re getting mad thinking about someone else doing this stuff. Why?

-Delish.com says it has the best banana bread recipe ever. We say who are they, our grandma? Anyway, it looks amazing, but, like, are we not, as humans, creatures of habit? Do we not prefer what we know? Like how every movie is a shittier version of a movie you already saw? Anyway, there’s choco in it, so go nuts.

-Eskimo Pie is renaming its popular line of choco-covered ice cream bars as Edy’s Pie after acknowledging the original name is pretty weird and racist. We say again—most people would rather systemic change happen than an ice cream bar get a name change, but it’s still at least something.

-Popsugar has some ideas for how to do things with dark roast coffee—like putting it in meat and chili and stew and stuff. We’re into it.

-This is a few months old, but we happened upon this Buzzfeed listicle of gross-ass looking food items, and we’re honestly OK with it as much as we’re not.

First reader to tell us the connection between this vid and this week’s edition of l’Fork gets...something. We’ll figure it out.

Finally

A Totally Scientific Breakdown of The Fork’s Correspondence

Number of Letters Received
29 *We thought you were our friends!

Most Helpful Tip of the Week (a barely edited letter from a reader)
“Tempura is not sushi!” *Oh wow, oh jeeze, really? Thank you SO MUCH for explaining that difference, reader who is the only person who’s ever eaten

Actually Helpful Tip
“Are you sleeping enough, Fork?” *No, Fork Fan Ryan T. We’re not. But you reminded us to try harder!

Charmed, we’re sure,
The Fork

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