The Fork

This felt like the winter that never was, but since The Fork was born in the spring, we're OK with that, even if it means this summer is going to be a nightmarish hellscape of blasting ACs and the like. And, since we're probably feeling warmer than we have in a long time by the time you read this, we had an epiphany about the coming months—cool treats are awesome!

Now, The Fork has some ol' standby favorites that we always like to have on hand when it gets warmer. First on the list? Trader Joe's Fruit Frenzy bars. They're this combo of lemon, raspberry and strawberry flavors and are delicious. Pick some up, thank us later.

And while we're talking about sweet treats, we stumbled across this recipe for lemon ice cream sandwiches. Oh. Em. Gee. What do y'all know about lemon ice cream? We know it's fantastic, and we're talking to those of you out there who just thought, "Why, lemon isn't a suitable ice cream flavor!" Get the heck outta here with that.

The Fork is also planning on making some healthy steps once things get warmer, and that includes Tupperware containers packed with chilled fruit balls. We're thinking watermelon for sure and maybe cantaloupe and honeydew, even if they are just garbagey melange-fillers that brunch joints invented to screw you out of pineapple and kiwi and strawberries in your fruit salad. Now, we figure one can't really go wrong when it comes to picking out a fruit baller (if it balls, it balls), but we're all about local, so visit Las Cosas Kitchen Shoppe and be like, "Yo, where's all your melon-ballers at, fool?" Jay-kay, be friendly.

Failing all that, we also found this bonkers Pinterest board that has nearly 100 suggestions for cool treats on hot days. We're dusting off our hands like we actually did something with that, but credit where credit is due: to Google for helping us find it.

We'd also point out there's not really an ice cream truck in The Fork's neighborhood, but we assume there's at least one around Santa Fe. If you see it, take a shot and email it our way so we can let others know. In the meantime, the local ice cream flattener-rollers of Freezie Fresh can probably be found outside the co-op (913 W Alameda St.), and their Facebook page is a good way to track their movements.

What do you like, Forkefeans? Shoot us your favorite cool-down treats because this year The Fork is all about variety. And the fruitballs we talked about earlier.

Also

-If you missed the local version of Restaurant Week, the Albuquerque iteration runs through this Sunday, March 11 and has, like, so much good food. That's also The Fork's birthday, so send fruit balls our way.

-While working on a top-secret special issue, we called San Francisco Street Bar & Grill and discovered that they're back up and running. Be aware.

-We also did some digging and found out that VIP weekend passes for the annual Cocktails and Culture Festival (June 1-3) are now available. We love this thing—it's food and booze, what's not to like?—and we think you should, too. See panels, try new things, learn of the proud heritage of margaritas and partake in exciting food competitions. And even if you can't swing the whole weekend, there's still lots to do every day.

-In case you hadn't heard, arts mega-corp Meow Wolf has expanded its food and drink service with Float, a café/eatery right inside the lobby there. We know they've had beer from Duel Brewing the whole time, but we now hear they have a lot of cool and weirdo cocktails as well. Have you been?

-Meanwhile, beloved local breakfast spot Tecolote is reportedly hoping to open for dinner service soon, a first in their long and tumultuous existence. You may recall the restaurant was forced out of its longtime building a couple years back but has found a new home at 1616 St. Michael's Drive. Give 'em a call at 988-1362 for more info, but don't call during peak hours because that's just rude.

-At Sunsets, Sweets and Songs, which goes down this Sunday March 11 at the Museum Hill Café from 6-8 pm, special desserts and music appear to help benefit the Santa Fe Prom Closet, an organization that helps get fancy dresses to young women who might otherwise have to engage in some kind of horrible She's All That makeover situation. Performances include Bella Gigante and Melanie Monsour, and we also hear they'll have beer and wine if you ask nice.

More Tidbits

-A Chicago food delivery driver was just trying to live his life and deliver his food when a man and a woman jumped out of nowhere and ka-bonged the driver in the face with a hammer. Jeeze! No word on what kind of food he was delivering, but they robbed him, too, so it's safe to say it was not that guy's day.

-The Fork is not a scientist (we're betting you still don't even know if we're one person or a group of people or a thousand monkeys on a thousand typewriters), but we find Rice University scientists etching food with graphene (the two-dimensional form of carbon) to be both cool and weird. What're we talking about? We're talking about this piece of toast with an owl on it.

-First, be excited that there's such a thing as an "apple detective" and then flip your lid over how one such hardboiled apple cop discovered that five apple varieties previously thought extinct have actually been rediscovered in Idaho. In your face, honey crisp—and everyone who acts like they're God's gift to apples!

–US News points out this week that just because you've gone plant-based with your diet doesn't mean it's smooth sailing from here on out. Apparently there are six big things to fret over.

-Programs that incentivize recipients of food stamps for eating healthy have proven quite popular but, wouldn't you know it, Trump's plans to slash such programs may change it all. Further details are available over on HuffPo, but The Fork would just like to say that our mom grew up on welfare and has horror stories about judgmental shoppers and clerks who seemingly believe poor people don't deserve to eat a freaking candy bar now and then. Ugh. We're mad about it.

Finally