A few years ago I was watching a crappy movie-of-the-week with Sienna Miller playing some Hitchcock blonde, and right then and there I decided to go all glowy-snowy. I had really long silver and chestnut tresses, but that was that and I was ready to transform into a flaxen minx. The next day I was platinum and loving it! I kept it for three years and worked it as a sleek bowl cut, as a sweet Marilyn, as a salty mermaid and finally, as a fried old stripper—I regret not a moment.

What I do regret, however, was having a Pandora's Box-era Louise Brooks bob, caterpillar-thick eyebrows and candy-apple-red lips for about six years back in the '80s. I was a Xerox of myself on repeat for years, slowly degenerating, because that's what happens; a mild form of insanity … ok, maybe not so mild.

How long have you been wearing that same, safe uniform, the same maquillage, the same beard and 'stache, the same trucker hat? You know, the shapeless, albeit comfy, tee with the unflattering crew neck? Matte, nude lips? Same haircut? For 20 years?! Oh, fudgesicle! I judge thee not, for I had square hair. Literally.

Thoughtlessness can catch up with you and then blammo—you're 50 and wearing the same oxblood Docs and Ramones tee you wore at 18. Don't be a fuddy-duddy; keep playing! But perhaps just change it up. How about a Southern gentleman look á la worn, crinkled linen suit avec a wilting gardenia? Seersucker ain't just for suckers! Dames, how about some Parisian balloon pants and a chic-as-heck houndstooth bolero?

We rent our bodies, yo, why not gut 'em and paint the walls? Make some cool curtains?

Unless it's an "Eat Shit & Die" tattoo on your nose (even that would garner a chuckle from me), it really doesn't matter in the big scheme of life.

Every day we get carte blanche to scribble-scrabble up the tabula rasa of ourselves and morph into any fantasy we want.

Yes, even you with the suit and the 9-to-5 job: Try a bow tie! Try a jaunty cap! Why not? Feed your vogue marrow with a chartreuse dickie. Really. Dickies need to come back!

Being a superstar in your mind takes practice, style, reinvention and flexibility! Try balls-to-the-wall variety, and DO NOT conform to your humdrum uniform.

An easy breezy way to transition from robot or art-bot is with a quickie hair and or make-up switcheroo.

We of the fairer sex have a fantastic local brand of truly organic makeup from Taos called Vapour. I swoon for Vapour's Aura Multi-Use stick in Whisper, and cream up the apples of my cheeks when I want an effortless glow. It shimmers and shines and makes one feel just divine. From juicy, cherry pink lips to smoldering Bette Davis eyes, Vapour has you covered. Grab some at Cupcake (322 Montezuma Ave., 988-4744) and prepare to transform.