7 Days

From Aug. 4

By SFR

1
Female city councilors reject male-sponsored nudity ban.
Clearly this issue can only be settled with nude mud wrestling.

2
City considers whether to release water into the Santa Fe River for the rest of the summer.
Depends on whether we’re allowed to skinny dip or not.

3
Gubernatorial candidates Susana Martinez and Diane Denish debate appropriateness of the state’s private jet.
Neither has yet to take a position on the private chef, masseuse and spiritual advisor.

4
There are fewer people in New Mexico prisons than there used to be.
Which means former elected officials now get their own private cells!

5
New Mexico is spending $9 million in stimulus money on a program to help high school drop-outs graduate.
This would be the “pound-foolish” part.

6

New Mexico Gas Company will start reading meters remotely.
And if that doesn’t work, they’ll start reading them psychically.

7

New Mexico Gas Company will start reading meters remotely.
And if that doesn’t work, they’ll start reading them psychically.

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