The assumptions of this sign are what's most interesting: It assumes the booze stealer will be known only to booze drinkers since this was the only placement of the sign in the store.
It assumes that if someone happens to know the guy who stole the booze, that person would rat him out (more booze for me when that guy's not stealing it all).
It also assumes anyone would care about such an incident when there is clearly a four-pack of Sparks-brand alcoholic energy drink priced at only $5.49.
Show us what has left the back of your eyelids burning. Send pictures of visual trespass and peculiarities to copyeditor [at] sfreporter.com, subject “eyedropper.” Thanks to all who contributed to this week's Eyedropper.