3 Questions

With More Than Two: A practical guide to ethical polyamory, authors Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert are out to set the record straight on the topic of poly relationships. As part of a big book tour, the pair present and sign copies on Saturday at 5 pm at op.cit books.                                                  

For the uninitiated, what are the keys to a good polyamorous relationship?

Wow…OK. That's a question with a complicated answer. I would say the keys are probably flexibility, good communication integrity and courage. Definitely courage.

Your website, morethantwo.com, has a do's and don'ts section. What is the most common mistake would-be poly partners make?

That's pretty easy. The most common mistake is they think they can legislate away jealousy by imposing structure. For example, [thinking] 'Well, if we both date the same person, nobody will ever feel jealous,' or 'If we only date people who are exclusive to us, nobody will ever feel jealous.'

Personally, what was the most enlightening part of writing this book?

One of the things that for me was really difficult but also enlightening was that for a long, long time I had written about polyamory, but I'd never actually written my own story. I had always written about the conclusions that I have drawn about how to do poly well, but I'd never written the story of my poly experiences personally. My partner Eve decided that was an important part of this book, and that was kind of an awesome experience.

Santa Fe Reporter