Sept. 23, 2017
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The Best Eavesdroppers Of the year

December 21, 2016, 12:00 am

Those bits of other people’s conversations that catch your ear at just the right moment are one of our favorite ways to recount the passing of time. Thanks to everyone who’s submitted an Eavesdropper to our collection in 2016. We’re counting on you to get us through 2017. So start listening to strangers and send your illicit listening tidbits to

“Going around saying ‘Satan’ over and over isn’t really in the Christmas spirit.”

Jan. 6—Overheard on Christmas Eve at the Canyon Road Farolito Walk

“I’m Jewish and I’m vegan. But I’m on vacation, so I’ll have a pulled pork slider.”

Jan. 13—Overheard at Cowgirl

“It’s harder to tell the tourists from the locals in the winter.”

Jan. 13—Overheard at the Plaza Café

“Red chile mixed with hollandaise makes Bronco orange sauce.”

Feb. 10—Overheard from a customer to a Broncos-clad waitress at Chris’ Café

“We’re at the ghetto Walmart, not the new Walmart.”

Feb. 17—Overheard at Walmart

“I wrestle with my demons, but sometimes we ­snuggle.”

Feb. 25—Overheard at Om Blessings

“She just texted me that she got laid off.”

“Oh, that’s terrible!”

“Well, at least now that she’s not working, I’ll have someone to pick me up from my colonoscopy.”

March 9—Overheard in the SFCC women’s locker room

“Oh my God, John Steinbeck is sooo hot!”

March 16—Overheard at Yoberri next to the Lensic, after seeing a poster for Of Mice and Men starring James Franco

“This is great beer. You sell anything non-alcoholic? Because I have a group over at the hotel, and some of them are non-alcoholics.”

April 13—Overheard at New Mexico Hard Cider

“Ugh. These cookies are all so mainstream.”

April 20—Overheard at Whole Foods

“My bad, Your Honor.”

April 27—Overheard from an assistant district attorney in Santa Fe’s downtown courthouse

“The clouds had so much to say today! They were really talking!”

May 4—Overheard at Tune-Up Café

First woman: “Siri will charge you for extra data if you don’t turn her off. Do you know Siri?”

Second woman: “Does she quilt?”

June 8—Overheard at Santa Fe Artisans Market

“My lifelong goal is to achieve wizard status.”

June 15—Overheard at The Dragon Room

“If it weren’t for doing volunteer work, I’d have no wardrobe.”

June 22—Overheard at Bed Bath & Beyond from a woman in an American Cancer Society jacket

“She puts money into an account for all my spiritual needs.”

July 13—Overheard at Whole Foods

“He said, ‘Send me a Snapchat.’ I’m like, ‘No. I’m not 12.’”

Aug. 24—Overheard on the Plaza

“It’s just like the State Fair, only all jewelry.”

Aug. 31—Overheard at Indian Market

“I totally went against my people and religion by attending Zozobra last week.”

Sept. 14—Overheard by an Uber driver

“I have an app that records smell.”

Sept. 21—Woman overheard while video recording chile roasting

“Where do they get all this stuff?”

Sept. 28—Overheard at the Museum of International Folk Art

“I finally splurged on an expensive German chainsaw. I don’t know why I waited so long.”

Oct. 26—Overheard at Back Road Pizza

“It ain’t all about strippers and burritos”

Oct. 26—Written on the wall of the bathroom of the Bull O’ the Woods Saloon, Red River

“If I knew you a little better, I would offer you the Demerol.”

Nov. 9—Overheard at Rio Chama


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