1

STARBUCKS RELEASES UNICORN FRAPPUCCINO

A sure sign of the end times … if the word "frappuccino" didn't already do the trick.

2

SANTA FE SCHOOLS BUDGET OUTLOOK IMPROVES

Soon we'll go from closing two schools to free unicorn frappuccinos for every boy and girl!

3

SANTA FE MANUAL HITS NEWSSTANDS

Now you know what to do for the next year.

4

THOUSANDS MARCH FOR SCIENCE

You can't ignore us! Unless, you know, you ignore us.

5

ARCHDIOCESE BACKS SUGARY DRINK TAX

Communion wine not affected. What would Jesus drink?

6

SUPREME COURT TO HEAR LEGISLATIVE LAWSUIT AGAINST GOVERNOR

Distinct possibility that the state will implode from all three branches of government being in the same place at the same time.

7

GOV, LAWMAKERS BICKER OVER FURLOUGHS

If anyone should be taking forced days off...