MARTINEZ THREATENS TO CALL SPECIAL LEGISLATIVE SESSION...
So that lawmakers can block the death penalty rebound one more time before she leaves office.
...EVEN WITH THAT TORN ACL FROM HER UTAH SKIING ACCIDENT
We assume she'll only take five days to recover—y'know, just like she'd want teachers to do.
AND YOU CAN STILL TAKE A GUN INTO THE ROUNDHOUSE
CITY COUNCILORS WANT TO BRING BACK SPEEDVANS
Only this time with no bribery.
MINIMUM WAGE MAY HIT $8.25, THEN $9
Just kidding. The governor is gonna veto that too.
TRUMP TARGETS MEALS ON WHEELS FOR CUTS
The death of so many former MoW recipients probably will save money in the long run.
FORMER TEN THOUSAND WAVES EMPLOYEE SUES OVER CASE OF 'HOT TUB LUNG'
He was researching his forthcoming book 10,000 Waves to Die.