1

TRUMP TAPS INDIANA GOVERNOR MIKE PENCE FOR RUNNING MATE

Score one for old white guys.

2

STARBUCKS AND McDONALD'S MOVE TO BLOCK PORN ON WI-FI

But you can still watch the Republican National Convention.

3

NEW MEXICO'S DELEGATES ARE MOSTLY UNITED FOR TRUMP

If we have to type that name one more time this week, we might turn orange.

4

REPUBLICAN CONVENTION IN CLEVELAND IS NUTS

Can we please just return to the news about Pokemon Go?

5

FACEBOOK MIGHT BUILD A STORAGE FACILITY IN UTAH

In a lose-lose for New Mexico, they get the jobs and PNM makes money from the electricity.

6

STATE PRISON POPULATION CONTINUES TO RISE AS NATION'S FALLS

Just doing our part to keep America great for the militarized police departments and the mega-corrections industrial complex.

7

GUN VIOLENCE PREVENTION GROUP TO BUY BACK WEAPONS FOR SCULPTURE

No background check needed to melt those suckers down.